There are days when I miss it,
the release that it brought me.
I miss the warmth of coursed through my body with every touch.
It didn’t define me, but it enhanced me.
It was electrifying.
To receive it from one person was beautiful, but deadly.
It meant that your heart was on the line… indefinitely.
Now I place little sprinkles of hope everywhere, hope a seed will take root.
Hoping that someone, somewhere, will care.
At first rejection meant nothing.
It was a product of the path that I had chosen.
Many seeds, means many failures.
Over time it got harder.
The pieces got bigger and the rejection, … each was more painful than the next.
Like living and dying all in one breath, the texts came swiftly to an end.
Sometimes there is an explanation,but more often than not they never even bothered to hit send.
Now it’s been three months and I’ve lived through it all.
How hard is it to say that “I like you,” without waiting for the other shoe to fall?
Now everything has a price, a specific outline to be right.
What happened to surprises and chivalry? A man that can say his desires and still be respectful.
A woman who is experienced and still wants to show the way?
Now the heart is fragile again, and the pain sets in.
The only medicine — the best friend.